terriblymisguided

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for ben

Sometimes Klaus wonders why he even bothers trying to sleep at home these days. Yes, he loves spending time with Obi-Wan, but they both need time to themselves, time to spend alone or be with other people. That space is important, and something that Klaus needs sometimes, but it's just so much easier for him to sleep at Obi-Wan's. That relaxing, cuddly son of a bitch.

Eventually, he gives up and rolls out of bed, slipping into a black silk robe before heading out into the hall. The house is quiet, so Klaus walks with light steps, maneuvering over the squeaky step near the landing. He heads for the kitchen to make himself some tea and a snack, but it isn't empty. Ben is sitting at the breakfast table and Klaus smiles a little at the sight of him. He finds comfort in it, too.

"Bored of sleep already?" Klaus teases, reaching out to ruffle his fingers through Ben's hair on his way to the cupboard. "Do you want some tea? It's sleepy time something or other. It has a bear in night cap on the box."

He holds it out in front of Ben's face to show him. "They can't have advertising like that without producing results."

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Ben's still not really used to sleep. He knows that he needs it, being a living, breathing, walking, talking, eating, drinking kind of guy, but sleep is the piece of the puzzle that he just hasn't figured out. He thinks it's got a lot to do with worry, because he still worries about how he can be alive and when that quiets down, his stomach will rumble and he'll worry about his powers.

So sleep? Not so much a guaranteed and easy thing.

He's still pretty relieved for company and Klaus' above the others. He loves them too! He really does, but he can be completely himself around Klaus, even his judgmental bitchy self, and it's not a surprise. "I mean, if a sleepy bear is going to drug me to sleep, who am I to say no?" he replies, eyeing Klaus. "Can't sleep? Or bad dreams?"

He's kind of proud and relieved, because Klaus being here means he's not passed out somewhere, which means there's definitely an easing off of the booze and drugs.

"Little of column A, little of column B," Klaus says, holding a hand up and waving it back and forth as he grabs the kettle and goes over to fill it in the sink. Making coffee or tea for Ben is not really all unfamiliar to Klaus. He would do it from time to time, out of habit, even though the cup would sit there and go cold. Things are different, now.

After lighting a burner and setting the kettle on it, Klaus turns to lean against the counter and look at Ben. Sometimes it's still so surreal to see him there in pajamas, hair tousled, cheeks pink. Alive.

"What about you?" Klaus asks, quirking a brow with a soft smile. "Still getting used to being a real boy again?"

Ben rubs at his eyes, trying to figure out why it is that he's still up. Well, he knows why. Worry is the reason why, but zeroing in on the specific cause of worry is the thing that could keep him up at night.

And oh, hey, here he is. He tugs a knee to his chest, settling his chin on the black sweatpants, peering at Klaus and knowing that at least he has this. He's always had this, but it hasn't gone away. "Eating, drinking, and all the fun human stuff," he agrees. "Needing sleep is weird, though. Weirder is how stupid a human body is about preventing you from doing it," he gripes.

"Run of the mill bad dreams?" he asks Klaus. "Or something specific?"

"I wouldn't know a thing about that," Klaus says sarcastically, because Ben knows better than anyone just how complicated that his relationship with sleep can be. As evidenced by his question. "No, nothing specific. Just--" He holds his hand up and jiggles it near his hear. "Murmurings."

The kettle starts to whistle and Klaus turns around to turn off the flame and carefully fills the waiting mugs. He twists to set them on the table and then turns back to grab the honey, setting the bear-shaped bottle on the table as he drops down into the chair around the corner of the table from Ben.

"I can imagine that it's overwhelming to be alive again, especially the quiet parts," Klaus says, smiling a little before snatching the honey bear and squeezing some into his tea. He sets it down again and then straightens, looking over at Ben with an excited smile. "Do you want to pop your weed cherry? I've got a great indica that'll make you sleepy."

His eyes narrow slightly and he holds a finger up before Ben can even open his mouth. "And don't give me any shit about weed. What's in this?" He asks, pointing that same finger down at the tea. "Plants that make you sleepy. And what's weed?" He points at Ben again. "A plant that makes you sleepy. Boom."

"Who's the loudest one, now that I'm not there?" Ben asks suddenly, because there's a whole ghost economy of attention that he's no longer a part of, seeing as he'd basically jumped right back into a human body and now he gets to talk to Klaus like all the other normal people, while Klaus listens to the other world.

Is it weird to feel a little left out? Ben thinks maybe that's some Stockholm Syndrome or something talking, because no way does he want to go back.

"I think I'll give weed a pass," he says apologetically. "Knowing me, it won't make me sleepy, it'll just make me paranoid and anxious." Nothing really turns out the way he wants. "I think I'll stick with the tea and good old fashioned worrying until I'm too tired to stay awake," he quips, giving Klaus a smile. "How often do the voices keep you up these days?"

It doesn't surprise Klaus one little bit that Ben turns down the offer, but at least he isn't judgey about it. Klaus lets that subject drop to latch onto a far more interesting one. He smiles widely and reaches over to pinch at Ben's cheek.

"Aw, Benny boy. You know you were different than all those other ghosts," Klaus tells him, and that's entirely true. Ben seemed to occupy a whole different place in his head than all of the other spirits. He would disappear when Klaus was very out of it, but he could still see his brother even when he wasn't completely sober. Maybe it was because they were together for so long, a seventeen year conjuring, or maybe it was something else. But Ben was always different.

"I felt it when you went away, you know," Klaus tells him, smiling sadly as he reaches up to touch his temple. "It was awful, one of the worst things I've ever felt."

He sighs and takes a sip from his mug, settling back into his chair and he looks over at Ben. "Here, it's all just noise. No one really louder than the other, most of the time. I didn't make another ghost buddy."

Ben's trying not to smile or be smug about that. Why should he care about competing with some other random ghosts inside Klaus' head? And yet, he does care. He cares a whole hell of a lot, because he does want to be special, and knowing that no one else has stepped up to try and invade on his space means a lot to him.

He's not sure, though, if this is better or worse than talking about the things keeping them awake. Really, it's just a different flavored bucket of trauma. They're going to have to do it sometime. "I guess a part of me thought maybe you'd be relieved," he admits, staring at his mug because he's not brave enough to look at Klaus. "You were finally free of me, you didn't have to worry about my voice in your ear."

"Never," Klaus says in a rare moment of complete sincerity, because Ben deserves to hear it. "Not for one second."

For all that he complained about Ben's incessant nagging, having it all suddenly taken from him was so much worse. There was an emptiness that he didn't really expect, like a gnawing pit inside of him. That emptiness is still there, just a little, because even though Ben is here, he still isn't taking up residence in Klaus's head. It's better like this, of course, with Ben alive and a true part of the family, but it still is going to be a bit of an adjustment.

"Come on, you can come watch me smoke pot and get sleepy then," Klaus tells him, rising to his feet with his mug of tea. If they happen to fall asleep in his room, tipped together like puppies in a way that seems to keep happening without them ever talking about it, then so be it.

He probably will, too. He's spent so long hovering around Klaus and mirroring him (because he had no choice as a ghost), that it's almost like habit. Ben takes the mug of tea with him, though, because he's not giving up any drinks or food now that he can enjoy them instead of staring wistfully at them.

And maybe that's just why he can't sleep in general? Sleep's not a ghost thing. It's a human thing, and he's just not used to that.

"I kind of miss you," he admits, "I know you're right there down the hall, but it's not the same," he complains, and if anyone will understand that, it's going to be Klaus.

"I know it isn't," Klaus replies, pausing at the base of the stairs to turn and smile at Ben, reaching out to put a hand on his shoulder for a moment. He's just so relieved that Ben still wants to be around him, and that none of their siblings seem to resent Klaus for keeping Ben to himself for so long. "And I do, too."

He pats Ben's cheek and then turns to begin the long trek up towards their room. "I bet you miss having the ability to float up all these fuckin' stairs."

Eventually they make it up to the top floor and Klaus turns into his room, grabbing a small box from the dresser and heading out onto the balcony. It's a little chilly, but the warm mug in his hand staves off the worst of it. "Kinda crazy how life is shaking out, huh?"

Ben snorts at the idea of stairs being a pain in the ass. He treasures every literal pain he gets, in the ass or the legs or anywhere. He loves stomachaches and insomnia. Sure, it sucks in the moment, but he loves that he gets to have it when as a ghost, he didn't get anything.

He still yanks his face away from Klaus' patting out of habit, but he doesn't mock-bite at his fingers, so he's improving from childish habits. "I don't know, it's crazy, but it's also better than home," he scoffs. "You can't tell me you're not happier here," is his pointed remark.

"Oh, I'm definitely happier here," Klaus says with a laugh. "That's the crazy part. We're trapped in this weird city full of magic and monsters and I have absolutely no desire to leave."

He hasn't said that out loud before, but it's true. As weird as it is, things are better here. All of his siblings are here (minus Diego, who Klaus still assumes is just dragging his feet and will show up eventually), all in one place and getting along. Ben is alive. He has Obi-Wan, which is this incredibly unexpected and wonderful thing. His sobriety is better, minus a few missteps here and there. Everything is just better.

There are two patio chairs on Klaus's small balcony, and he drops into one and gestures for Ben to sit in the other. He sets his mug on the ground and flips open the tin in his lap to pull out a joint, tapping it against his palm as he grins over at Ben. "I don't have to ask where you're happier."

It's not like Ben really gets a choice. He only gets to stay or be dead. It's not exactly stellar choices, so he'll obviously stick with the one that allows him to keep talking to his siblings, and have actual experiences. "I mean, obviously I'm happier here, but I also never made it into the light. Who knows what heaven would've been like?" he jokes.

Still, the settled smile on his face says it all.

He is happy. Happier than he'd ever been before, when he'd been weighted down by Reginald's disapproval and then, well, ghost-town, population him. Ben settles into the chair, tugging his hoodie a little snugger around himself. "I get to eat pizza here, this place wins," he promises.

"Very drab," Klaus replies, though he doesn't think what he saw was heaven. Reginald Hargreeves was there, so it couldn't have been. A strange purgatory, maybe. "Boring. It'd have to be."

He brings the joint to his lips and lights it, taking a long drag before turning his head to exhale over the balcony. Even watching Ben shiver and bundle up in his jacket brings Klaus a certain level of joy, because it's wonderful reminder of what he is now.

"And you get to flirt with girls," Klaus points out with a smirk. "Just thought I'd remind you, since I don't seem to see you doing it."

"At least until you show up," Ben teases, "then heaven will be a real party." He follows along and hugs the railing of the balcony, wrapped around it like he needs something to hold onto, and he's extra grateful for the proximity so when he blushes furiously, he's facing down.

"Wow," is the sarcastic deadpan, "I'm not flirting with girls in front of you? Can't imagine why, it's not like if I did, they'd all have eyes for you instead." It's not even physical looks. Klaus is just charismatic and magnetic in the same way that Ben is just sort of cute and dependable. He knows he'd be good for someone, but it's hard to outshine Klaus.

Klaus lets out a delighted laugh at that, nearly choking on the smoke in his lungs as he tosses his head back with it. Oh, Ben. Sweet, sweet Benjamin.

"It's adorable that you think that I'm getting into heaven," he gets out before exhaling up into the sky. "That ship sailed a long time ago, I think."

God told Klaus to his face that she didn't like him. Kind of shitty, actually, but how many people can say that?

"Yeah, when presented with two options, girls tend to go for the corporeal one." He rolls his eyes, and uses the two fingers holding the joint to point at Ben. "So, you're flirting with girls when I'm not around, then? You're out there tearing it up?"

"Yeah, but you didn't have a guy on the inside before," Ben says, his smile a little sad, because maybe Klaus is right, but Ben's not letting it go without a fight. "You deserve that kind of happiness and if I have to piss off some angels to make sure you're there, then I'm gonna do it."

Or he'll just sneak him in.

"Or the experienced one," Ben counters, sipping his tea, burying his face in the steam so that'll be the reason his cheeks are flush. "It's not, it's not flirting. I've just met some girls and we talk, that's all."

Klaus has very little to say to that, but only because he's genuinely touched and he still kind of freezes up like one of those fainting ghosts when he feels a positive emotion. He gives Ben a smile, soft and genuine, and nods a little bit before taking another drag from his joint.

If there is really a heaven, then no, Klaus doesn't think he'll be getting into it. Ben will, though. And Ben would fight for him, even after all he's done. He'd get in the face of God Herself, so Klaus doesn't argue with him. It's a nice sentiment.

"Look, I gotta know, do you think I'd try to take a girl from you?" Klaus asks, slightly exasperated. "Because I told you, I honestly had no idea about your crush on-- ugh, I know she had glasses. I wouldn't do that to you, man."

He rolls his eyes up towards the ceiling a bit and shrugs apologetically. "I wouldn't knowingly do that to you."

"Dude, no," Ben hurries to say. He doesn't blame Klaus for what happened with Jill, mainly because it's not like anything could have happened with Ben. He had a crush and sure, he got upset that she wasn't the person he thought, but that's not on Klaus.

What did he expect, in a very sex-positive cult, after all?

"Jill," he reminds him, but when he rolls his eyes this time, it's nothing but fond. "I possessed your body and we talked, but it would've been weird if we'd done more." Not that he hadn't thought about it, though, and okay, so he had kind of been going down that road...

It's not that he thinks Klaus would do it willingly. "You're just cooler than me, you know? Charismatic and flirting is something you're good at. You're charming and hot and people like that," he says, and it's objective because he's been around long enough to see it. "If you and me are standing side by side, I know I'm not getting the first look."

"Yeah, you and I have crossed a lot of lines, but that would have been a big one," Klaus says with a laugh. He would have gotten over it, though. His body's been used for much worse, after all.

"Of course I'm cooler than you." He shrugs and takes another drag from the joint, looking at his brother thoughtfully before turning his head to exhale. "But I'm also kind of a pain in the ass. I'm unpredictable, I sleep around, I never take things seriously."

He shrugs and settles back into his chair again, kicking his feet up to cross his ankles and rest them on Ben's thigh. "Some people like coffee, some like tea. There are plenty of girls out there that would see you and not look twice at me. Now that you're visible, that is."

After a moment, he lets out a quiet giggle. "That rhymed."

Ben's shifted so his knee is drawn to his chest as he rests the teacup on top of it, balancing precariously, giving Klaus a tenderly fond smile. "You're cool and a pain in the ass and unpredictable and fun," he puts a lot of emphasis on that one. "You really think I would've hung around and not walked into the light if you were boring?" he quips.

"Nah, I would've been out of here." His eyes are warm, and Klaus' impromptu poem gets a joyful laugh out of him. "You're stoned," he accuses, "because that wasn't that funny." Still, he's kind of grateful for the message at the heart of it. "I'm terrified of all of it. We were dad's superheroes and then I was dead. I don't know how to do any of that."

"You still laughed, though," Klaus points out, watching Ben as he takes another long pull from the joint. Ben's comment makes him feel warm and happy, because for as much as they can be a pain in the ass to each other, there's so much love there.

"You'll learn, Ben." He sits up and stubs the joint out in ashtray once it's burned down to his fingers, and then rests his elbows on his knees as he looks at his brother. "You were on the outside watching for so long, and to suddenly be a part of it all must be terrifying, but you'll get the hang of it. I have no doubt."

Klaus pats Ben's knee and then stands up to toss his arms out to the side. "Now give us a hug."

Yeah. He did laugh. That's totally on him, because he's not stoned, so what excuse does he have? It's not like he owes Klaus to make him think he's funny, but he thinks he'd probably still do it anyway. Ben groans when Klaus asks for a hug, even if he knows he'll do that, too, and sets the teacup aside.

"Only because we're overdue on some brotherly affection," he says, which is bullshit, he'd do this anytime he's not pissed at Klaus, and hugs him tightly, burying his face into Klaus' shoulder to hide how nervous he is about all the stuff he missed.

It scares him, and he doesn't like admitting it.

"You gonna be my mentor?" he teases, when he eases back.

"Yes, only because of that," Klaus says dryly, but he can't help the grin that spreads across his face as Ben steps forward to hug him. Klaus wraps his arms around Ben in return, clapping him once on the back before simply hanging on tight and marveling" over the fact that this is something they can do now. S

"I'll do my best, but I'll know you'll be fine," Klaus assures him, hooking his chin over Ben's shoulder. "It'll be a hell of an adjustment period, but we're all here for you, man."

When Klaus finally pulls away, he goes over to his bed and climbs in, tossing the covers back in invitation. Sometimes they wind up in the same bed like they're little kids and not men in their early thirties, but that's okay. Ben used to live in his head, so sharing a bed is nothing. And if sometimes it makes the both of them feel a little more settled, that's okay too.

Ben rolls his eyes, makes a face that includes wrinkled up nose and his eyes shut tight like he's going to be mad about it, and then he climbs right into bed because he's not going to give up a good old-fashioned brotherly cuddle, not when they're both in a good mood.

Besides, if this actually helps to sleep?

"Don't steal the blankets," he warns, "or I'll knee you in the stomach to get them back."

"Yeah, yeah," Klaus yawns out, shifting around and tossing his arm over Ben's middle as he curls in close and tucks his face into the warm curve of Ben's neck. With Ben no longer residing in his head, this is about as close as they can get.

He doesn't think either of them could be blamed for wanting it, even if they never talk about why.

"Sweet dreams, idiot," Klaus says fondly, reaching up to cover Ben's face with his hand and let out a loud snore just under his ear. "I love you."

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